Wedding Policies & Guidelines
All best wishes for your celebration!
Couples with no particular religious community, couples of differing religious backgrounds, and couples unable (because of theology, divorce, sexual orientation or other factors) to be married/united by their own clergy or in their usual church or synagogue frequently come to a Unitarian Universalist minister for their ceremonies. While I make no doctrinal demands of any couple, I do have some basic requirements for couples who wish to have me officiate their ceremony. If, after reading over these policies and guidelines, you decide to have me officiate your ceremony, please complete the Wedding/Union Service Reservation Form and contact me for our first planning meeting. (The wedding fee deposit of $50 will be collected at that time.)
These are the “ground rules” for weddings & union services I perform:
1. Wedding/Union Fees
a) Basic Ceremony Honorarium: 10% of Wedding Budget ($450 minimum)
As a Unitarian Universalist minister, I perform weddings and other rites of passage. My honorarium for officiating weddings is 10% of your wedding budget (not including any honeymoon expenses) with a minimum of $450. This basic honorarium covers 2-3 planning meetings with the couple, a 1 hour rehearsal, and the ceremony. My ceremonies are usually 30 - 40 minutes long with the shortest being 15 minutes and the longest being 1 hour. Longer ceremonies can be crafted, but are not recommended and will increase the fee.
b) Travel Expenses: .67 / mile or $50, whichever is greater
If the site of your wedding is farther than 30 miles from Oneonta, NY, you will need to cover mileage costs of sixty-seven cents per mile for both the rehearsal and the wedding. If the distance is such that overnight accommodations are required, the cost of such accommodations is also your responsibility.
c) Program: $50
I will provide a digital order of service for the ceremony. If you would like me to craft the OOS into a more elaborate program, there will be an additional fee of $50.
d) Celebration Attendance: $100+
While I appreciate being invited to other parts of the celebration (the rehearsal dinner, the reception, etc.), I may decide not to attend due to other demands on my time. If you require my presence at any of these additional celebrations (to coordinate, give a blessing, or other reason), then an additional fee of $100 will be added per event.
These are the basic fees. They can be adjusted up or down depending on the level of complexity of the ceremony, the amount of time/work required, and the timing of the rehearsal/ceremony.
2. There is a $50 nonrefundable deposit due, along with the Ceremony Reservation Form, at or before the first meeting. The balance of the basic fees are due no later than 2 weeks BEFORE the date of the ceremony, unless you make other arrangements with me. Should you decide to cancel the ceremony after paying the full amount, but more than 48 hours before the ceremony, I will refund 1/2 of the basic fee. If you cancel with less than 48 hours notice, the total fee is forfeit.
3. If you are members of a Unitarian Universalist congregation or your wedding is being held in another church, the appropriate minister will need to invite me to conduct the ceremony.
4. You are welcome to invite family members and/or friends to participate in your ceremony as readers. If you would like to have a family member who is a member of the clergy co-officiate, that can be discussed. I am willing to co-officiate with clergy of another faith that are not family members, but there may be an additional fee due to the increased planning and coordination.
5. You must meet with me to plan your wedding. There is no set Unitarian Universalist wedding ceremony. Each wedding ceremony is crafted to suit the couple and is unique. As mentioned, this usually requires 2-3 meetings. If there is a question of distance, these meetings can be conducted via phone or Zoom-- though at least one should be in person, if possible.
6. As I suffer from chemical sensitivities, any candles used in the ceremony MUST be scent-free. If the wedding is indoors, the wedding party is asked to refrain from wearing heavy perfumes, colognes, or scents. I apologize for the inconvenience, but it is a matter of health for me.
7. I have been authorized to officiate ceremonies by the congregations I have served in Wisconsin, Illinois, New York. If officiating in a different state than those listed, special arrangements may need to be made.
8. Finally, please remember that, while I am glad to be able to offer a "ceremony ministry" to the community, this is a service and not an obligation. If for any reason I decide that I can not in good conscience officiate your wedding, I reserve the right to end my participation and to recuse myself. In such cases, I will return the deposit and any fee payments made.